[CanYoAssDigIt] Health Stats and Harmless Fun

Why is it that when a health problem shared by both sexes is found to be
more prevalent (or, sometimes, even so much as present at all) in women,
it's an alarming trend and needs money poured into it and is one more
trophy of victimhood, whereas, when men are doing worse in some area,
it's not worthy of commentary?
sugarzareh

*Washington State Department of Health <http://www.doh.wa.gov>*

Date: June 01, 2005
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
(05-066)
Contact: Phyllis Reed, Research Investigator, 360-236-4324
Patricia Starzyk, Research Investigator, 360-236-4323
Deanna Whitman, Communications Office, 360-236-4022

*Women living longer; infant mortality dropping*
/2003 Vital Statistics also shows change in top baby names /

*OLYMPIA* -- In 2003 Washington had a lower percent of low-weight
births, a lower infant mortality rate, and a higher life expectancy rate
than the nation as a whole. These are just a few of the highlights from
the Washington State Department of Health report, Vital Statistics,
2003. "This report is full of helpful information and is used by many
people throughout our state to understand trends, identify high-risk
populations, set priorities and target prevention activities," said Dr.
Pat Starzyk, the report's co-author.

*Births*

For decades, there has been a consistent decline in the rate of births
in Washington. And although more than 80,000 babies were born in 2003,
the birth rate is among the lowest recorded. Dr. Starzyk explains, "The
total number of new births is increasing, but the birth rate, which is
the number of births per 1,000 population, is declining."

Washington's percent of low-weight births is lower than the national
average, but our low birth weight births have been increasing since 1990
- in part, but not entirely due to the increase in multiple births.

The percent of expectant mothers who received prenatal care during their
first trimester worsened in 2003. In prior years the percent of moms
receiving first trimester prenatal care was approximately 83 percent. In
2003 the percentage dropped to 81.5. This year also marked the highest
proportion of mothers in the past 10 years who received late or no
prenatal care.

Birth certificates underwent important changes in 2003. People may now
report as many races as they choose. Nearly 3 percent of mothers
reported belonging to more than one race group. Birth certificates now
collect information on smoking patterns prior to pregnancy and by
trimester during pregnancy. The new data shows women reduce their
smoking during pregnancy; 13 percent of mothers smoked in the three
months before pregnancy compared to 10 percent during the first
trimester and 9 percent for the second and third trimesters.

The top baby name changed in 2003. Emma became the top name for girls in
2003, replacing Emily, which had been the top name for seven years.
Ethan replaced Jacob as the top name for boys in 2002, but Jacob
regained the lead in 2003, a lead it had for eight other years.

*Deaths*

Although more than 45,000 Washington residents died in 2003, the
age-adjusted death rate was the lowest it has been in the last 10 years.
Men's age-adjusted death rate was 924 deaths per 100,000 population,
decreasing 12 percent from the 10-year high point. For women the rate
was 671.4, decreasing 5 percent from its high point. Even with these
declines, the 2003 age-adjusted mortality rate for men is 1.4 times
higher than women. Men are expected to live to age 76 and women until 80.

Heart disease and cancer accounted for more than 48 percent of all
deaths in 2003. The 10 leading causes of death
<http://www.doh.wa.gov/ehsphl/chs/chs-data/death/download/deathC2.xls>
accounted for more than 80 percent of all deaths among residents.

There was a decrease in infant mortality in 2003. There were 5.6 deaths
per 1,000 live births compared to 6.2 ten years ago (1994).

*Marriages and divorces*

In 2003 more than 39,000 couples got married and more than 26,000
divorces occurred. King County (the most populous county) took the lead
with 11,250 marriages and 5,637 divorces. Garfield County (the least
populous county) had the least - 15 marriages and eight divorces.

*Related Topics*

* Emergency Information <HTTP://access.wa.gov/emergency/index.aspx>
* Previous Agency News <HTTP://access.wa.gov/news/PreviousMonths.aspx>
* How to Submit a News Release
<HTTP://access.wa.gov/siteinfo/resources/submitnews.aspx>
* Current Legislative News <HTTP://access.wa.gov/leg/LegNews.aspx>
* Radio, Television and Newspapers
<http://www.statechamp.com/cgi-bin/start.pl?State=Washington>
* Subscribe to the Access Washington News List
<http://listserv.wa.gov/archives/access-washington-news.html>
* Join an Email List (Listserv)
<http://listserv.wa.gov/archives/welcome.html>
* Current Agency News <HTTP://access.wa.gov/news/MoreStateNews.aspx>

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Nine Inch Nails Pulled From MTV Ceremony Over Bush Picture

from www.democracynow.org:

The music band, Nine Inch Nails, has pulled out of the MTV Movie
Awards after clashing with the network over an image of President Bush
that the band planned as a performance backdrop. The image was to
accompany the song "The Hand That Feeds," which criticizes the
occupation of Iraq. MTV said in a statement it would have been
"uncomfortable with their performance being built around a partisan
political statement." The leader of Nine Inch Nails, Trent Reznor,
said on the band's Web site that the image of Bush would have been
unaltered. Reznor said "Apparently, the image of our president is as
offensive to MTV as it is to me."

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Re: [Bizarro_UltraZine] Halle Berry still thinking about posing for Playboy...

Wow, that is truly amazing! I'm glad I was sitting down when I read
this, I might have fallen and hurt myself.

Meanwhile, in some completely trivial news:

Three Bombings Rock Iraq
In Iraq, three suicide car bombs killed at least 16 people and wounded
more than 50 others early this morning. One attack targeted bodyguards
for a deputy prime minister, another went after a U.S. diplomatic
convoy, and the third killed a political leader in Baquba. Two more US
soldiers were killed bringing the number of U.S. troops killed in Iraq
to 1,666.

On 6/2/05, kdhaisch@aol.com <kdhaisch@aol.com> wrote:
> from the IMDb...
>
> Halle Berry once promised to fulfill longtime Playboy picture
> editor Marilyn Grabowski's dream and bare all for the men's
> magazine. The actress was an aspiring superstar 10 years
> ago when she agreed to meet with Grabowski after she was
> made an attractive offer to pose for Hugh Hefner's publication.
>
> Grabowski, who discovered Pamela Anderson and Anna
> Nicole Smith among others, recalls, "Halle Berry, I had dinner
> with 10 years ago and she said, 'When I've got the right film,
> I'll do it.' She wanted to (do it) but I haven't heard from her
> in the last couple of years."
>
> Grabowski reveals the magazine also approached Britney
> Spears, but she wanted a "ridiculous" amount of money to
> disrobe: "It was too much, let's put it that way."
> ---------------------------------------------
>
> What was too much? Her boobs??
>
> k.
>
>
> .
>
>
> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
>
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

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Re: [CanYoAssDigIt] My Date With the Exorcist

Amusing story for sure. One day I'll tell you about my ex-girlfriend
who seriously claimed to regularly speak in tongues. She could do it
at will and it was genuinely coming from God himself. I actually
lived with this person for a time. I must've been buttfucking crazy.

On 5/28/05, Joe Sibley <joesibley@comcast.net> wrote:
> This story has always gotten a big laugh from anyone I've told it to. I
> hadn't thought of it for a while, but I was at one of the locations
> involved tonight and was reminded. And now, with these discussion
> groups, I've found my dream audience.
>
> You'll have to take my word for it that this is true. It has an
> extremely dark side in that it's a sickening tragedy for this woman's
> poor son. Still, I defy anyone not to laugh. It do go on for a bit, so
> you may want to grab a bottle of some monastery liqueur to sip and
> remind you that the Catholic church was at least good for one thing.
>
> May, 2002: The romance was like a fairy tale, in that it was improbable
> and really stupid. We met by chance, she liked my hair, I liked her
> face, this is America, what else should matter? We talked several times
> on the phone before going out. It was established that she was a
> godster, I wasn't, and we could both live with it. In retrospect this
> seems a ludicrous proposition. My excuse is that I had just started
> antidepressants, and as a side effect was going through a priapic second
> pubescence. Her excuse is that she's crazy.
>
> We went to Mercato, a rather upscale joint, at least for a working class
> schmuck like me. The food was great, the tiny table shaky, the
> atmosphere vapid. Expensive nonetheless. I was out of my element, with
> vinegar and oil to dip the bread in, crème brulee, yadda. I remember the
> dinner conversation being pleasant, although I couldn't tell you what it
> was about. But, boy howdy, I can remember what we talked about later.
>
> On the way home, we stopped at Ralph's (That's a supermarket, for our
> friends in Tacoma and Seattle.) for some reason or other. After checking
> out, we sat on a bench in the foyer. Which happened to be near Ralph's
> book section. Although Ralph's has the usual selection of
> below-lowest-common-denominator magazines, all of their books proper are
> christer merde. She pulled one off the shelf and told me that it would
> be a very good thing if I were to read it. So much for the belief system
> détente.
>
> The book was by a home-town (Lacey) author, and a story of demonic
> possession. Not fiction. My date thought it important that I be warned
> such things can happen. Even in Thurston County, I guess. From this
> point on, those readers among you who have seen the movie "True Stories"
> can get a fairly accurate picture of my expressions by remembering John
> Goodman's character, Lewis Fyne, as he listens to what The Lying Woman
> is telling him on their date.
>
> Well, okay, thinks I, it can't get worse. (Fucking Celexa, anyway.) She
> went on from there to tell me that the same thing had happened to her 17
> year old son. Of the many spooky goings-on in their household, the one I
> remember in the most detail is about the demon manifesting outside the
> boy's body, without a host.
>
> The boy, y'see, had been given a phone number by a buddy he met at
> Catholic youth camp in California. This buddy knew exactly what to do in
> case of possession, and had advised my date's son to give him a call in
> case it happened. Good friend, because you just never know when that
> might happen. The son was lying on the couch, possessed, physically ill,
> just ALL messed up. He had the phone number with him. But who should
> come in and steal it but the demon in the guise of mom! I never quite
> understood how the demon was possessing him and outside of him at the
> same time. (See? At this point the story started not to make sense.)
>
> Mom took him to St. Peter Hospital. (btw Isn't that kind of a foreboding
> name for a hospital?) The shrink diagnosed paranoid schizophrenia. Mom
> did not like that. No paranoid schizophrenics in our house, are there
> dear? She sought a second opinion. And a third. This being after all a
> Catholic hospital, she eventually found a "doctor" who puts the "quack"
> into AFLAC, and this doctor said: "This is not a matter for medicine. It
> is a matter for The Church."
>
> Mom took the kid, who was not paranoid schizophrenic at all or anything
> like that, home and got on the horn to the local diocese (-I think. I'm
> not too swift with Catholic taxonomy). It turns out that western
> Washington, hell, all of Washington, is slap out of exorcists. Finally
> she found one in Chicago, who talked her through the procedure by phone
> and fax. (Wasn't it nice of God to invent the fax machine?) It worked.
>
> Since then, the kid wears a St. Christopher medal and about a dozen
> others, and Mr. Demon has not been back.
>
> To paraphrase Nigel Tufnel: "We shan't date together again."
>
>
>
>
>
> Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Sign O The Times

From today's Olympian, re W. Mark Felt revealing himself as Watergate
Deep Throat: "What made a straight-laced career FBI guy turn on the
White House?"

"Turn on" the White House? The tone implies that Felt was some kind of
vindictive traitor for doing what he could to expose lawbreaking. I
don't see the question in why a "straight-laced" law enforcement
professional would attempt to assist in bringing a criminal to justice.

But, my thinking on this is stuck in the seventies, when authority was
sometimes questioned, and for a while it looked as if we had a chance of
becoming "A nation of laws, and not of men." That's Old-Age thinking.
Now it's just "support the president no matter what he does, wave flags,
and watch Fox."

sugarzareh

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[CanYoAssDigIt] They should be horsewhipped!

It may be underway by now, for all I know. I am not the world's best
tracker of popular culture anymore.

I read an interview with Brian May in which he said that Queen was
going to be touring with Paul Rogers (Free, Bad Company, The Firm) on
vocals. Rogers has a rock pedigree, that's for sure... but the idea of
him standing in for Freddie Mercury is bizarre. Oh, I could see it on
"we will rock you" or something like that... but Bohemian Rhapsody?

The bass player is pretty much retired from the industry, and refuses
to take part in any of these things.. so it leaves two of the original
band members involved.

It seems a bit like Paul and Ringo touring with Long John Baldry or
John Mayall and calling it "The Beatles and..."

If May and what's-his-name really felt they had to do this (mortgage
due on the mansion, or whatever), they really should have thought
about Annie Lennox standing in for Freddie Mercury instead.

It doesn't matter. There are so many terrible and huge things going on
in the world that are of so much greater concern - global warming,
AIDS, genetically modified food, little dogs in sweaters... now that
I've commented on this, I'll probably never think about it again. But
I just couldn't let it go by without comment....

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Re: [Can Yo' ass Dig It?] 5/31/2005 10:04:26 PM

Hi jl

I'm always surprised when somebody actually finds my blog and posts.
In fact, this is only the second time ever.

all other posts are either from me or my friend Sugarzareh.

I've set it up so that if anybody posts to my group,
canyoassdigit@yahoogroups.com, it automatically goes up on my website.
Just like this e-mail to you is going to! Despite the group having 15
members, nobody else has ever posted. Not even Viagra spam or
financial opportunities in Nigeria, as far as I can recall. You can
bet yoass that I dig hearing from people now and again.

I googled you, and find that while you visit people's blogs and say
nice things (which I applaud) your own page appears to be blank. I
look forward to seeing your comics someday.

please consider joining my yahoo group by sending an e-mail to
canyoassdigit-subscribe@yahoogroups.com - it would be cool to have
somebody else posting once in a while...

On 5/31/05, Adia Creator <jl@adiacomics.com> wrote:
> My ass digs it! And it's dug. Nice blog!
>
> --
> Posted by Adia Creator to Can Yo' ass Dig It? at 5/31/2005 10:04:26 PM

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Watch This Short Film

http://www.centerofyourmind.com/images/dancemonkey.swf

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[CanYoAssDigIt] The War on Science

--- In OlympiaTacomaAtheists@yahoogroups.com, Joe Sibley
<joesibley@c...> wrote:
Thank you Dan. You have done a service in alerting us to this revoltin
development. For those of you who haven't looked over Randi's page
thoroughly, be advised that he provides an email contact to let the
Smithsonian know how you feel about this. I am in favor of legalizing
prostitution, but not this particular kind.
Joe

dang wrote:

> In case you didn't catch this controversy, apparently the Smithsonian
> Institute is providing a place for Seattle's Discovery Institute to
> show an intelligent design film--in exchange for a $16,000 donation.
> This is apparently the Smithsonian's mode of operation for providing
> theater space, though it adds an undeserved air of credibility to the
> people who want to insert religion into science curriculum.
>
> It's the first item on this James Randi's site, which includes a link
> to a NY Times article, a well-written letter to the Smithsonian, etc.
>
> http://www.randi.org/jr/052705a.html
>
> - Dan
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> *Yahoo! Groups Links*
>
> * To visit your group on the web, go to:
> http://groups.yahoo.com/group/SeattleAtheistsForum/
>
> * To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
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>
<mailto:SeattleAtheistsForum-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com?subject=Unsubscribe>
>
> * Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of
> Service <http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/>.
>
>
--- End forwarded message ---

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Re: [CanYoAssDigIt] Language watch - painful!

I'd like to disassemble Dubya.

Just kidding. That would be wrong.

Matt Love wrote:

>I just heard Dubya say that Amnesty International's report about is
>"absurd." He says that the organization is taking the word of people
>who have been trained to "hate America... to disassemble - that means
>'to lie.'"
>
>There is hope for complete fools, they can become president... but is
>there hope for the rest of us?
>
>
>
>Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Excellent Links!

Check these out, Diggers, you'll be glad you did!

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Rachael Mamane <rmamane@gmail.com>
Date: May 31, 2005 2:21 PM
Subject: [seattlecacophony] Go BLF!
To: seattlecacophony@yahoogroups.com

The Billboard Liberation Front has hit again. Check out:

http://laughingsquid.com/2005/05/30/billboard-liberation-front-to-serve-man/

Boing Boing picked up as well:

http://www.boingboing.net/2005/05/30/billboard_liberation.html

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[CanYoAssDigIt] My Bad

I've been comparing Dubya to Nero. That is not correct. I should have
been compairing him to Caligula - Bush Sr compares favorably to
Claudius, and Jeb will play the role of Nero. Sorry for the
innaccuracies.

May 13, 2005

The Sleazy World of Jeb Bush
Miami Vice
By CHRIS FLOYD

The next president of the United States was on the road last week,
throwing red meat about "moral issues" to a baying crowd of Bushist
Party faithful while simultaneously trying to cut off medical support
for a six-year-old girl his agents had previously tried to kill.

Yes, it was Jeb Bush, governor of the ruling family's Florida
dominions, pounding the pulpit, er, podium at a Republican conclave in
Georgia. Jeb told the flock that the party must stand for "absolute
truth" something previously associated with religious cults if they
want to maintain their "ascendancy" over the nation, Associated Press
reports. "There is such a thing as right and wrong," he declared.
Whipped into a frenzy by this blazing revelation, the crowd responded
with cries for Bush to ascend to his brother's throne in 2008.

But even as Jeb basked in the bootlicking adulation, his peculiar
sense of "right and wrong" was on vivid display in a Florida
courtroom. There, his minions are fighting to stop state aid for young
Marissa Amora four years after they sought a court order to let her
die following a savage beating, the Palm Beach Post reports. What's
more, these same minions the Department of Children and Families could
have prevented the beating, which left Marissa permanently disabled.

In late 2000, as Jeb was ensuring the "ascendancy" of his brother by
among many other tricks deliberately slashing thousands of eligible
African-American voters from the rolls, Marissa was hospitalized for a
month. Doctors and nurses saw telltale signs of past beatings and
witnessed her neglectful mother abusing her in the hospital. They
pleaded for DCF to intervene. But the agency perhaps mindful of Jeb's
fierce public championing of "family values" declined to step in.

Then came the inevitable: a few weeks later, Marissa was back in the
hospital, beaten nearly to death, with severe injuries to her brain
and liver and several broken bones. Now the DCF took an interest: they
rushed to court to obtain a "Do Not Resuscitate" order for the mangled
two-year-old. For God's sake, don't let her live, the DCF told
Marisa's doctors, because she might "potentially" be left "in a
vegetative state."

But the doctors disagreed with the Bushists' expert diagnosis. And so
Marissa is still alive today brain-damaged, crippled, fed through a
stomach tube, but alert, talkative, happy, with a new foster mother.
Indeed, she would seem to be a shining example of the "culture of
life" that we hear so much about these days from certain
pulpit-pounding politicians. But to Jeb and the DCF, she's just a
"useless eater," a budgetary burden, a mistake to be flushed away.
Without state aid, her new family will sink beneath the staggering
cost of Marissa's treatment and the decent life that she's clawed back
from the hellhole Jeb left her in years ago will wither on the vine.

'Tis passing strange. After all, this is the same agency the same
governor that just fought all the way to the Supreme Court to keep the
long brain-dead Teri Schiavo existing in a very real "vegetative
state." Jeb even found himself lauded on the front page of the New
York Times for "cementing his political stature" in the case, with his
maneuvers "rooted" in a "deeply-held" religious faith "rather than in
political posturing." Yet he was perfectly willing even eager to pull
the plug on Marissa Amora, and is still trying to destroy her life.

How can this be? For one who lives solely by the "absolute truth,"
what could possibly be the difference between a crippled, abused,
neglected little black girl with no money or connections, and a nice
white woman whose case was promoted world-wide by the maniacal,
filthy-rich extremist factions that form the base of his brother's
"ascendancy"? Since we know from the highest authority that Jeb would
never stoop to mere "political posturing," the apparent hideous
hypocrisy in his behavior must forever remain an ineffable mystery,
like the Trinity, or the 2000 Florida election results.

But then, Jeb has always been the most mysterious of the Kennebunkport
Klan. Like the two Georges, he trawled murky waters indeed to make his
fortune. One of his business partners, Camilo Padrera, was indicted
for drug-dealing, gun-running and embezzlement; but the charges were
dropped when the Bush family firm the CIA told the FBI that Padrera
was their man, fronting covert ops. Padrera then worked Jeb's
Washington contacts to steal millions of federal dollars intended to
provide housing for the poor. He was convicted of fraud in 1989.

Jeb then hooked up with Miguel Recarey, an associate of Miami mob boss
Santo Trafficante Jr., Mother Jones reports. Federal investigators
called Recarey's company, IMC, "a criminal enterprise interlaced with
intelligence operations." It was in fact yet another front, this time
for the Reagan-Bush gang's illegal terrorist war in Nicaragua. Recarey
also milked Jeb's Washington connections, diverting millions of
Medicare dollars intended for needy patients into the IMF-CIA slush
fund. Recarey later fled the country to avoid fraud charges.

In yet another scam, Jeb and a partner used a frontman to wangle a
$4.5 million federal loan to buy an office building. When their shill
went belly-up, Daddy's federal government obligingly revalued the
prime Miami real estate at $500,000. Jeb and pal coughed up that chump
change --and kept the building for themselves: $4 million of pure
gravy.

Now with just one more step, this mobbed-up, money-grubbing absolutist
will have the whole world in his hands. "Right and wrong" mean nothing
to such big-time operators; power is their only truth, their only god.

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Language watch - painful!

I just heard Dubya say that Amnesty International's report about is
"absurd." He says that the organization is taking the word of people
who have been trained to "hate America... to disassemble - that means
'to lie.'"

There is hope for complete fools, they can become president... but is
there hope for the rest of us?

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[CanYoAssDigIt] My Date With the Exorcist

This story has always gotten a big laugh from anyone I've told it to. I
hadn't thought of it for a while, but I was at one of the locations
involved tonight and was reminded. And now, with these discussion
groups, I’ve found my dream audience.

You’ll have to take my word for it that this is true. It has an
extremely dark side in that it’s a sickening tragedy for this woman’s
poor son. Still, I defy anyone not to laugh. It do go on for a bit, so
you may want to grab a bottle of some monastery liqueur to sip and
remind you that the Catholic church was at least good for one thing.

May, 2002: The romance was like a fairy tale, in that it was improbable
and really stupid. We met by chance, she liked my hair, I liked her
face, this is America, what else should matter? We talked several times
on the phone before going out. It was established that she was a
godster, I wasn’t, and we could both live with it. In retrospect this
seems a ludicrous proposition. My excuse is that I had just started
antidepressants, and as a side effect was going through a priapic second
pubescence. Her excuse is that she’s crazy.

We went to Mercato, a rather upscale joint, at least for a working class
schmuck like me. The food was great, the tiny table shaky, the
atmosphere vapid. Expensive nonetheless. I was out of my element, with
vinegar and oil to dip the bread in, crème brulee, yadda. I remember the
dinner conversation being pleasant, although I couldn’t tell you what it
was about. But, boy howdy, I can remember what we talked about later.

On the way home, we stopped at Ralph’s (That’s a supermarket, for our
friends in Tacoma and Seattle.) for some reason or other. After checking
out, we sat on a bench in the foyer. Which happened to be near Ralph’s
book section. Although Ralph’s has the usual selection of
below-lowest-common-denominator magazines, all of their books proper are
christer merde. She pulled one off the shelf and told me that it would
be a very good thing if I were to read it. So much for the belief system
détente.

The book was by a home-town (Lacey) author, and a story of demonic
possession. Not fiction. My date thought it important that I be warned
such things can happen. Even in Thurston County, I guess. From this
point on, those readers among you who have seen the movie “True Stories”
can get a fairly accurate picture of my expressions by remembering John
Goodman’s character, Lewis Fyne, as he listens to what The Lying Woman
is telling him on their date.

Well, okay, thinks I, it can’t get worse. (Fucking Celexa, anyway.) She
went on from there to tell me that the same thing had happened to her 17
year old son. Of the many spooky goings-on in their household, the one I
remember in the most detail is about the demon manifesting outside the
boy’s body, without a host.

The boy, y’see, had been given a phone number by a buddy he met at
Catholic youth camp in California. This buddy knew exactly what to do in
case of possession, and had advised my date's son to give him a call in
case it happened. Good friend, because you just never know when that
might happen. The son was lying on the couch, possessed, physically ill,
just ALL messed up. He had the phone number with him. But who should
come in and steal it but the demon in the guise of mom! I never quite
understood how the demon was possessing him and outside of him at the
same time. (See? At this point the story started not to make sense.)

Mom took him to St. Peter Hospital. (btw Isn’t that kind of a foreboding
name for a hospital?) The shrink diagnosed paranoid schizophrenia. Mom
did not like that. No paranoid schizophrenics in our house, are there
dear? She sought a second opinion. And a third. This being after all a
Catholic hospital, she eventually found a “doctor” who puts the “quack”
into AFLAC, and this doctor said: “This is not a matter for medicine. It
is a matter for The Church.”

Mom took the kid, who was not paranoid schizophrenic at all or anything
like that, home and got on the horn to the local diocese (-I think. I’m
not too swift with Catholic taxonomy). It turns out that western
Washington, hell, all of Washington, is slap out of exorcists. Finally
she found one in Chicago, who talked her through the procedure by phone
and fax. (Wasn't it nice of God to invent the fax machine?) It worked.

Since then, the kid wears a St. Christopher medal and about a dozen
others, and Mr. Demon has not been back.

To paraphrase Nigel Tufnel: “We shan’t date together again.”

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Re: [CanYoAssDigIt] Zappa Plays Zappa Tour

As another non-doctor, I agree with the diagnosis. Given the difficulty
of Frank's music, not to mention new arrangements thereof, and that the
band will be non-Zappa veterans, three months does not sound like long
enough to me. If I were Dweezil, I'd pay Ahmet to stay out of the project.
sugarzareh

Matt Love wrote:

>This tour could be very cool.
>
>Dweezil's comments about computers are interesting. Could he have
>inherited his father's (apparently - I'm no doctor)
>obsessive-compusive personality?
>________________________________________________________________________
>
> Date: Sat, 14 May 2005 20:36:24 -0000
> From: "feickerr" <feickerr@yahoo.com>
>Subject: Re: Zappa Plays Zappa tour
>
>--- In DweezilZappa@yahoogroups.com, Antal Adriaanse
><spiegelbeeld@y...> wrote:
>
>
>>from alt.fan.frank-zappa:
>>This From Universal Audio webzine May 2005:
>>
>>"In addition to all the audio restoration he's been
>>doing, Dweezil has been
>>recording a new solo album titled, Go With What You
>>Know, which is coming
>>out in May 2005.
>>
>>"I haven't really decided what direction to take this
>>new solo record that'
>>I'm working on," he says. "I have some stuff that's a
>>little more old-school
>>and some stuff that's more modern-sounding. It will
>>include my version of
>>'Peaches' [Frank Zappa's song 'Peaches en Regalia].
>>It's going to be a weird
>>combination of things. I went from someone who had
>>zero computer knowledge
>>whatsoever to working on computers eighteen hours a
>>day."
>>
>>Immediately after the release of his solo album,
>>Dweezil will go into
>>rehearsals with his brother Ahmet and a handpicked
>>band. The brothers Zappa
>>will be touring the world with a project called "Zappa
>>Plays Zappa."
>>
>>"We have a really big plan for this year, something
>>that we've never done
>>before." Dweezil says. "We're going to put a band
>>together and play only
>>Frank's music. We're going to start in Europe then
>>come back to the states
>>and then go to Japan. We're going to start in October,
>>so we're going to
>>rehearse the band for three months in order to learn
>>close to fifty songs,
>>including a lot of the very difficult instrumentals.
>>I'm learning a lot of
>>stuff on guitar that was never meant to be played on
>>guitar. For me, it will
>>be like training for the Guitar Olympics. We are going
>>to create a core band
>>of people that haven't played with Frank, and then we
>>will have some special
>>guests and Ahmet is going to sing. We want to have our
>>own thing that we do
>>that is free from interpretations of other people's
>>expectations.
>>
>>"We are going to change the instrumental arrangements.
>>The melodies will be
>>seen and heard in a different way," he continues. "The
>>melodies may be more
>>powerful because they are being played on a louder,
>>more distorted
>>instrument-- guitar instead of keyboard or a marimba.
>>I think [because] my
>>brother and I are related, we have an innate sense of
>>what Frank was going
>>for humor-wise. Those are some of the elements that
>>we'll be able to bring a
>>new and fun interpretation of. The show itself is
>>going to have video
>>footage, and a documentary about Frank will be shown
>>before the show.
>>
>>
>>
>>Discover Yahoo!
>>Use Yahoo! to plan a weekend, have fun online and more. Check it out!
>>http://discover.yahoo.com/
>>
>>
>
>
>Awesome!
>
>
>
>
>________________________________________________________________________
>________________________________________________________________________
>
>
>
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>
>
>
>
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>
>
>
>Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Zappa Plays Zappa Tour

This tour could be very cool.

Dweezil's comments about computers are interesting. Could he have
inherited his father's (apparently - I'm no doctor)
obsessive-compusive personality?
________________________________________________________________________

Date: Sat, 14 May 2005 20:36:24 -0000
From: "feickerr" <feickerr@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: Zappa Plays Zappa tour

--- In DweezilZappa@yahoogroups.com, Antal Adriaanse
<spiegelbeeld@y...> wrote:
> from alt.fan.frank-zappa:
> This From Universal Audio webzine May 2005:
>
> "In addition to all the audio restoration he's been
> doing, Dweezil has been
> recording a new solo album titled, Go With What You
> Know, which is coming
> out in May 2005.
>
> "I haven't really decided what direction to take this
> new solo record that'
> I'm working on," he says. "I have some stuff that's a
> little more old-school
> and some stuff that's more modern-sounding. It will
> include my version of
> 'Peaches' [Frank Zappa's song 'Peaches en Regalia].
> It's going to be a weird
> combination of things. I went from someone who had
> zero computer knowledge
> whatsoever to working on computers eighteen hours a
> day."
>
> Immediately after the release of his solo album,
> Dweezil will go into
> rehearsals with his brother Ahmet and a handpicked
> band. The brothers Zappa
> will be touring the world with a project called "Zappa
> Plays Zappa."
>
> "We have a really big plan for this year, something
> that we've never done
> before." Dweezil says. "We're going to put a band
> together and play only
> Frank's music. We're going to start in Europe then
> come back to the states
> and then go to Japan. We're going to start in October,
> so we're going to
> rehearse the band for three months in order to learn
> close to fifty songs,
> including a lot of the very difficult instrumentals.
> I'm learning a lot of
> stuff on guitar that was never meant to be played on
> guitar. For me, it will
> be like training for the Guitar Olympics. We are going
> to create a core band
> of people that haven't played with Frank, and then we
> will have some special
> guests and Ahmet is going to sing. We want to have our
> own thing that we do
> that is free from interpretations of other people's
> expectations.
>
> "We are going to change the instrumental arrangements.
> The melodies will be
> seen and heard in a different way," he continues. "The
> melodies may be more
> powerful because they are being played on a louder,
> more distorted
> instrument-- guitar instead of keyboard or a marimba.
> I think [because] my
> brother and I are related, we have an innate sense of
> what Frank was going
> for humor-wise. Those are some of the elements that
> we'll be able to bring a
> new and fun interpretation of. The show itself is
> going to have video
> footage, and a documentary about Frank will be shown
> before the show.
>
>
>
> Discover Yahoo!
> Use Yahoo! to plan a weekend, have fun online and more. Check it out!
> http://discover.yahoo.com/

Awesome!

________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Imperial Stormtroopers RIP

Wars are always about our freedom, aren't they? Since WW2 the US has not
made war to defend itself once.For that one minute at 3:00, will US
torture worldwide stop for one minute? Will Homeland Security stop for
one minute reminding people that they better be careful what they say?
Will there be a 60-second hiatus in the persecution of victimless crimes
like recreational drug use and prostitution? Will the corporate state
turn over control to the populace for one minute? Any bets?
sugarzareh

State News Release

*Washington State Department of Veterans Affairs <http://www.dva.wa.gov/>*

Date: May 25, 2005
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: John King, Director, (360) 725-2153
Heidi Audette, Public Relations & Legislative Manager, (360) 725-2154

*Memorial Day National Moment of Remembrance*
/Citizens asked to pause at 3:00 p.m. to reflect on freedom /

*OLYMPIA --* On Monday,May 30, 2005, at 3 p.m., Americans across the
country will join President Bush in taking a moment to remember and
honor those men and women who died in service to our country.

Washington State citizens are asked to participate in this act of
national unity, designed to encourage people to reflect for one minute
on those who made the ultimate sacrifice.

"/The National Moment of Remembrance is an act of American unity to
honor our heroes, make the day relevant to our younger generations, and
demonstrate gratitude and respect. It is a moment that everyone can
spare/," said John King, director of the Washington State Department of
Veterans Affairs.

The White House Commission on the National Moment of Remembrance was
established by an act of Congress, to put the "memorial" back in
Memorial Day and to reclaim its original purpose of honoring America's
fallen heroes.

The time was chosen because mid-afternoon is when many Americans are
enjoying the freedoms ensured by those who fought to preserve them. The
one-minute pause in activities at 3 p.m. local time is not intended to
replace Memorial Day ceremonies, but to highlight the purpose of
Memorial Day and to reflect on the sacrifice of those who died for our
freedom.

President Abraham Lincoln summed up the importance of remembering all
fallen heroes when he said, "The mystic chords of memory, stretching
from every battlefield and patriot grave to every living heart...should
swell into a mighty chorus of remembrance, gratitude and rededication on
this solemn occasion."

For more information on Memorial Day activities in Washington State go
to http://www.dva.wa.gov <http://www.dva.wa.gov/>. For information on
the White House Commission on the National Moment of Remembrance, go to
http://www.remember.gov/.

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[CanYoAssDigIt] More Twisted Justification for the Drug War

If meth were legal, this problem would not exist.

State News Release

*Washington State Department of Ecology <http://www.ecy.wa.gov>*

Date: May 25, 2005
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Contact: Mary-Ellen Voss, Public Information Officer, (360) 407-7211

*The dark side of camping: Meth-lab dumpsites*

*OLYMPIA* -- Somewhere between Spokane and Grays Harbor counties, hidden
under a tarp or strung out across a campsite, are the remains of a
methamphetamine drug lab.

Meth cooks often dump waste at local, state, national parks and
campgrounds because getting rid of meth-lab waste, in most cases,
separates the cooks from criminal evidence that could land them in jail.

"Their attitude is, why dump it at home and possibly get caught with the
waste if you can simply walk away from the mess," said David Byers, who
supervises spill and hazardous-materials response for the Department of
Ecology.

Byers said that unsuspecting families who are trying to get away and
enjoy nature are the ones at risk.

Campers, hikers, picnickers, fishermen and others should be on the
lookout for suspicious products left over from meth labs. These include
propane tanks or other pressurized cylinders, strong ammonia odors,
starter-fluid spray cans, shredded lithium batteries, Red Devil Lye
(drain cleaner), muriatic or hydrochloric acid, empty cold-medicine
packages or containers, plastic tubing, glass jars, funnels, coffee
filters, hypodermic needles and containers of acetone, toluene and
Coleman Fuel.

The used propane tanks are often corroded and have jury-rigged valves
and tubing that can fail, spraying ammonia or hydrogen-chloride gas that
attacks eyes and lungs. Ecology responders have found fire
extinguishers, scuba tanks, soda dispensers and all sizes of pressurized
cylinders used in producing meth.

"Meth cooks are doing whatever it takes to avoid getting caught,
including moving into rural areas where they're not detected as easily,"
said Byers.

More than 400 drug labs and dump sites have been reported already this
year, and the discovery rate tends to increase in the spring and summer
months.

People may inadvertently stumble across active or abandon meth labs
while out enjoying the warmer weather.

Meth waste is toxic to people and the environment, and some meth waste
can be flammable, which could present another problem for parks and
forests if there is another dry summer.

Anyone who comes across an active or deserted meth-lab site should leave
the area immediately and contact the local police or sheriff's
department, said Byers.

*Related Topics*

* Emergency Information <HTTP://access.wa.gov/emergency/index.aspx>
* Previous Agency News <HTTP://access.wa.gov/news/PreviousMonths.aspx>
* How to Submit a News Release
<HTTP://access.wa.gov/siteinfo/resources/submitnews.aspx>
* Current Legislative News <HTTP://access.wa.gov/leg/LegNews.aspx>
* Radio, Television and Newspapers
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<http://listserv.wa.gov/archives/welcome.html>
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Re: [CanYoAssDigIt] Perfect Band Name

For some reason, even after machine translation, her writing still comes
off as lyrical. I hope you weren't serious about the name making perfect
sense in context, though.
sugarzareh

Matt Love wrote:

>Lulina, in collaboration with the Google language translation tool,
>has come up with the perfect band name: Avenged Mattress
>
>This name may be a little unusual, but in context it makes perfect sense:
>
>20050525
>GrazaDeus tomorrow is holiday.
>
>To sleep. La la la. To sleep. To eat gostosa food in the front of the TV.
>To read To read until cochilar in the sofa. Holiday is the best thing
>of the calendar.
>Brebotear. To take cervejinha in the bar. Now of the side of mine
>casinha has one botequinho with two small tables.
>Cineminha. Blanket. Violão. Stockings in the soil. Avenged mattress.
>Wine. Pasta.
>Holiday is so good.
>I do not go pra Varginha, I only want mine camiiinhaaa.
>To be in house eating bread with cheese and guaraná.
>My hair seems a kneaded pillow.
>My olheiras seem of are bernardine.
>Holiday is so good.
>Holiday is so boooooom.
>
>
>(I imagined myself in a pyjamas musical comedy, floating for city:: now)
>
>posted by Lulins @ 10:05
>Comments (5)
>20050524
>
>
>
>Yahoo! Groups Links
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Perfect Band Name

Lulina, in collaboration with the Google language translation tool,
has come up with the perfect band name: Avenged Mattress

This name may be a little unusual, but in context it makes perfect sense:

20050525
GrazaDeus tomorrow is holiday.

To sleep. La la la. To sleep. To eat gostosa food in the front of the TV.
To read To read until cochilar in the sofa. Holiday is the best thing
of the calendar.
Brebotear. To take cervejinha in the bar. Now of the side of mine
casinha has one botequinho with two small tables.
Cineminha. Blanket. Violão. Stockings in the soil. Avenged mattress.
Wine. Pasta.
Holiday is so good.
I do not go pra Varginha, I only want mine camiiinhaaa.
To be in house eating bread with cheese and guaraná.
My hair seems a kneaded pillow.
My olheiras seem of are bernardine.
Holiday is so good.
Holiday is so boooooom.

(I imagined myself in a pyjamas musical comedy, floating for city:: now)

posted by Lulins @ 10:05
Comments (5)
20050524

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