I've finally achieved consistency in my life. Any person of average or above intelligence can predict what I will say next with unerring accuracy. And what I say will always be wrong.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Sardar is in a disscussion class of cockroach



These Sardar Jokes are hilarious man, I'm going to collect them all.  Here's another one:

Sardar is in a disscussion class of cockroach.

He cuts its 1 leg, and says, "chal", it walks.

He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "chal" , it walks.

He cuts all the legs and said, "chal...." Finally he wrote the conclusion.. ....

"after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf......"


On Mon, May 11, 2009 at 4:47 PM, matt love <mattlove1@gmail.com> wrote:
> Stop it, stop it, BahiLog, you're killing me with the jokes already!
>
> BahiLog
> Loyal Member
>
> Joined: 10 Mar 2009
> Posts: 55
> Location: INDIA
> Posted: NiceFun.net    Post Subject: Three Sardar's were sleeping on a Bad
> ________________________________
> Three Sardar's were sleeping on a Bad, The Place was so conjusted.
>
> One Sardar Get up and slept down...
>
> Another saardar said now Place is open, Now up Come….

>



--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends.  Learn the details here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M05c46wdXU

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Re: Detailed Mail



Well, I'm very happy to hear from you again, Mr Andrew Wong. It turns
out that Mr. Dave Walker was a kind of fly-by-night fellow, if you
know what I mean... my last email to him bounced like flubber! Maybe
he's just absent minded and allowed his email to fill up, who knows?
Anyway, I'm glad I wasn't counting on his 6.8 million dollars, because
I guess I won't be getting it now. I like your 24.5 million dollars
better anyway, it's much thicker and sweeter.

I think I may have told you this already, I have so many high-flying
business deals going all the time it's pretty hard to keep up with
everythign all at once, but anyway, my partners at Bizarro
Ultrafilms and I are going to go into production soon with our
big-budget movie "Wrestling Women Vs. the Aztec Mummy on the Titanic."

We are planning to cast Hugh Jackman and Julia Roberts as the leads in
this production (and Cybill Shepherd in a major supporting role) so
we're going to need some serious cash from any place we can find it,
so we'll be glad to take your money, it's as green as anybody else's
(and when i say "green" I don't mean to imply it lacks experience,
LOL!)

So send me the money, quick, we want to start filming soon... Jackman
is getting more expensive all the time, we want to get that contract
signed!

Your Partner,
Mr. Matt Love

On Tue, May 12, 2009 at 10:37 PM, Mr Andrew Wong
<mrwong07_hk@yahoo.com.hk> wrote:
>
>
> Thank you very much for your prompt interest to my email.Let me start by
> introducing myself, I am Mr. Andrew Wong Credit Officer of the Hang Seng
> Bank Ltd in
> Hong Kong.
>
> Before the U.S and Iraqi war our client Major Fadi Basem who was withthe
> Iraqi forces and also business man made a numbered fixed deposit for 18
> calendar
> months, with a value of $24,500,000.00 (Twenty Four millions Five Hundred
> Thousand United State Dollars) only in my branch. Upon maturity several
> notices was
> sent to him, even during the war early this year.
>
> Again after the war another notification was sent and still no response came
> from him. We later find out that the Major and his family had been killed
> during
> the war in bomb blast that hit their home.
>
> After further investigation it was also discovered that Major Fadi Basem did
> not declare any next of kin in his official papers including the paper work
> of
> his bank deposit. And he also confided in me the last time he was at my
> office that no one except me knew of his deposit in my bank. So, Twenty Four
> millions
> Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars is still lying in my bank and no
> one will ever come forward to claimit. What bothers me most is that
> according to
> the laws of my country at the expiration 3 years the funds will revert to
> the ownership of the Hong Kong Government if nobody applies to claim the
> funds.
>
> Against this backdrop, my suggestion to you is that I will like you as a
> foreigner to stand as the next of kin to Major Fadi Basem so that you will
> be able
> to receive his funds.
>
> WHAT IS TO BE DONE:
>
> I want you to know that I have had everything planned out so that we shall
> come out successful. I have contacted an attorney that will prepare the
> necessary
> document that will back you up as the next of kin to Major Fadi Basem , all
> that is required from you at this stage is for you to provide me with the
> following informations:
>
> Your Full Names:
> Age:
> Address:
> Occupation:
> Country of residence:
>
> For the attorney to commence his job. After you have been made the next of
> kin, the attorney will also fill in for claims on your behalf and secure the
> necessary approval and letter of probate in your favour for the move of the
> funds to an account that will be provided by you.
>
> There is no risk involved at all in this matter as we are going to adopt a
> legalized method and the attorney will prepare all the necessary
> documents.
>
> Please endeavour to observe utmost discretion in all matters concerning this
> issue. Once the funds have been transferred to your nominated bank account
> we
> shall share in the ratio of 50% for me, 50% for you.
>
> Thanks for your prompt response,
>
> I wait to hear from you.
>
> Your Partner,
> Mr. Andrew Wong
> ________________________________
> Yahoo!推出全新 @ymail.com 電郵地址,快D登記你的新身份!了解更多

--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. Learn the
details here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M05c46wdXU

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Re: Dear Lucky Winner,



Hey, thanks, Mr. Morris

That's a pretty good haul.  What is that, about 2 million dollars?  I
have no idea what a £ goes for these days.

It's not as good as the $6.8 million dollars Mr. Dave Walker promised
me a few weeks ago, or the whopping $24,500,000 Mr. Andrew Wong said
he'd make available to me the other day, but I'm happy to accept your
$2 million or whatever it is, because my partners at Bizarro
Ultrafilms and I are going to go into production soon with our
big-budget movie "Wrestling Women Vs. the Aztec Mummy on the Titanic."

We are planning to cast Hugh Jackman and Julia Roberts as the leads in
this production (and Cybill Shepherd in a major supporting role) so
we're going to need some serious cash from any place we can find it,
so we'll be glad to take your money, it's as green as anybody else's
(and I don't mean to remind you of the Irish troubles when I say that,
LOL!)

So send me the money, quick!

On Wed, May 13, 2009 at 10:11 PM, NATIONAL LOTTERY <info@co.uk> wrote:
>
>
> Dear Lucky Winner,
>
> Your email ID was awarded (£1,000,000,00  GBP),  in the tobacco Promo.
>
> 1.Full Name: 2.Full Address: 3.Status: 4.Occupation: 5.Phone Number:
> 6.Country:
>
>
> Sincerely,
> Mr. Liam Morris.
>
--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends.  Learn the
details here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M05c46wdXU

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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Coffee, Free, and Me

Possibly the best opportunity you will have to enjoy a free cup of coffee at my expense all year. All you have to do is sit through a 3 hour sales pitch for a timeshare - I mean, a 90 minute concert by Matt Love (the entertainment value is about the same).



Source: eventful.com
Jun 18, 2009 7:00 pm - 8:30 pm (Thursday) at Mandolin Books and Coffee Company, featuring Matt Love. Get more details about this event on Eventful.

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Event details from Asswipe McFatface... Matt Love and Free Coffee





 
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Matt Love and Free Coffee
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Thursday, June 18, 2009
Mandolin Books and Coffee Company - Edmonton, AB
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--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends.  Learn the details here:

http://www.xtranormal.com/xtranormal/episode.php?aid=303120&mid=20090419185438400

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Re: Read Me!!



Hey Mr. Wong,

This is great! I could really use $24,500,000 million dollars. I've
made a short film that I want to expand into a feature length movie.
It's a musical. It's autobiographical. I might make a trilogy kind of
thing, like Star Wars. My life has been so eventful and interesting,
it might take 3 films to get all the important stuff in. My first
marriage was kind of like when Darth Vader blew up Princess Leia's
planet, if you know what I mean, LOL!

Anyway, I know that everybody will want to see it. But I only had
enough money to make a 90 second short
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8M05c46wdXU) please watch it and let
me know what you think. I got an offer for $6.8 million dollars a few
weeks ago from Mr. Dave Walker, but I like your deal better. Take
that, Mr. Dave Walker!

But anyway, I can sure use that $24,500,000 million dollars, so whip
it out. Don't let this excellent deal to remain obscured for very
much longer!

Your new friend and business partner,
Matt

ps. In Junior High, I had a friend named Howard Wong. Are you related
to him by any chance? He lived in Hong Kong until he was 3, he's an
attorney in the Seattle area now. Just wondering, as Wong is a pretty
uncommon name...

On Tue, May 12, 2009 at 10:47 AM, Mr Andrew Wong <info@hsbc.com.hk> wrote:
>  I am Mr.Andrew Wong,I have a obscured business suggestion for you of
> $24,500,000USD.SEND REPLY TO MY PRIVATE E-MAIL:mrwong07_hk@yahoo.com.hk I
> will update you with
>

--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. Learn the
details here:

http://www.xtranormal.com/xtranormal/episode.php?aid=303120&mid=20090419185438400

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Monday, May 11, 2009

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: Three Sardar's were sleeping on a Bad ... JOKE



Stop it, stop it, BahiLog, you're killing me with the jokes already!

BahiLog
Loyal Member
Loyal Member


Joined: 10 Mar 2009
Posts: 55
Location: INDIA

PostPosted: NiceFun.net    Post Subject: Three Sardar's were sleeping on a Bad Reply With Quote

Three Sardar's were sleeping on a Bad, The Place was so conjusted.

One Sardar Get up and slept down...

Another saardar said now Place is open, Now up Come….

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Thursday, May 07, 2009

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Mea Culpa



You folks know that for years I've been advancing the theory that comic books were invented by the Jews. Once an obscure notion, too avant garde to even be discussed in polite society, a number of recent books seem to confirm this idea.

I want you to be the first to know I am abandoning my criminal and deranged ideas on the subject.  In the interest of remaining a free crackpot (rather than a incarcerated one - see the following article) I am withdrawing the accusation that Jews invented comic books, and from this point forward, I will assign the blame to people that everybody can openly mock, hate, and misrepresent with no repercussions.

Folks, my current understanding is that comic books were invented by Arabs, Satanists, and fat people.

May 7, 2009

The End of Free Speech?

Criminalizing Criticism of Israel

By PAUL CRAIG ROBERTS

On October 16, 2004, President George W. Bush signed the Israel Lobby's bill, the Global Anti-Semitism Review Act.  This legislation requires the US Department of State to monitor anti-semitism world wide.

To monitor anti-semitism, it has to be defined.  What is the definition?  Basically, as defined by the Israel Lobby and Abe Foxman, it boils down to any criticism of Israel or Jews. 

Rahm Israel Emanuel hasn't been mopping floors at the White House.
As soon as he gets the Hate Crimes Prevention Act of 2009 passed, it will become a crime for any American to tell the truth about Israel's treatment of Palestinians and theft of their lands.  

It will be a crime for Christians to acknowledge the New Testament's account of Jews demanding the crucifixion of Jesus.

It will be a crime to report the extraordinary influence of the Israel Lobby on the White House and Congress, such as the AIPAC-written resolutions praising Israel for its war crimes against the Palestinians in Gaza that were endorsed by 100 per cent  of the US Senate and 99 per cent  of the House of Representatives, while the rest of the world condemned Israel for its barbarity. 

It will be a crime to doubt the Holocaust.  

It will become a crime to note the disproportionate representation of Jews in the media, finance, and foreign policy.

In other words, it means the end of free speech, free inquiry, and the First Amendment to the Constitution. Any facts or truths that cast aspersion upon Israel will simply be banned. 

Given the hubris of the US government, which leads Washington to apply US law to every country and organization, what will happen to the International Red Cross, the United Nations Commission on Human Rights, and the various human rights organizations that have demanded investigations of Israel's military assault on Gaza's civilian population?  Will they all be arrested for the hate crime of "excessive" criticism of Israel?

This is a serious question. 

A recent UN report, which is yet to be released in its entirety, blames Israel for the deaths and injuries that occurred within the United Nations premises in Gaza.  The Israeli government has responded by charging that the UN report is "tendentious, patently biased,"  which puts the UN report into the State Department's category of excessive criticism and strong anti-Israel sentiment.

Israel is getting away with its blatant use of the American government to silence its critics despite the fact that the Israeli press and Israeli soldiers have exposed the Israeli atrocities in Gaza and the premeditated murder of women and children urged upon the Israeli invaders by rabbis.  These acts are clearly war crimes.  

It was the Israeli press that published the pictures of the Israeli soldiers' T-shirts that  indicate that the willful murder of women and children is now the culture of the Israeli army.  The T-shirts are horrific expressions of barbarity.  For example, one shows a pregnant Palestinian woman with a crosshairs over her stomach and the slogan, "One shot, two kills."  These T-shirts are an indication that Israel's policy toward the Palestinians is one of extermination.

It has been true for years that the most potent criticism of Israel's mistreatment of the Palestinians comes from the Israeli press and Israeli peace groups.  For example, the Israeli newspaper Haaretz and Jeff Halper of ICAHD have shown a moral conscience that apparently does not exist in the Western democracies where Israel's crimes are covered up and even praised.

Will the American hate crime bill be applied to Haaretz and Jeff Halper?  Will American commentators who say nothing themselves but simply report what Haaretz and Halper have said be arrested for "spreading hatred of Israel, an anti-semitic act"?

Many Americans have been brainwashed by the propaganda that Palestinians are terrorists who threaten innocent Israel.  These Americans will see the censorship as merely part of the necessary war on terror.  They will accept the demonization of fellow citizens who report unpalatable facts about Israel and agree that such people should be punished for aiding and abetting terrorists.

A massive push is underway to criminalize criticism of Israel.  American university professors have fallen victim to the well organized attempt to eliminate all criticism of Israel.  Norman Finkelstein was denied tenure at a Catholic university because of the power of the Israel Lobby.  Now the Israel Lobby is after University of California  (at Santa Barbara,) professor Wiliam Robinson.  Robinson's crime:  his course on global affairs included some reading assignments critical of Israel's invasion of Gaza.

The Israel Lobby apparently succeeded in convincing the Obama Justice (sic) Department that it is anti-semitic to accuse two Jewish AIPAC officials, Steven Rosen and Keith Weissman, of spying.  The Israel Lobby succeeded in getting their trial delayed for four years, and now Attorney General Eric Holder has dropped charges.  Yet, Larry Franklin, the DOD official accused of giving secret material to Rosen and Weissman, is serving 12 years and 7 months in prison.

The absurdity is extraordinary.  The two Israeli agents are not guilty of receiving secrets, but the American official is guilty of giving secrets to them!  If there is no spy in the story, how was Franklin convicted of giving secrets to a spy?

Criminalizing criticism of Israel destroys any hope of America having an independent foreign policy in the Middle East that serves American rather than Israeli interests.  It eliminates  any prospect of Americans escaping from their enculturation with Israeli propaganda. 

To keep American minds captive, the Lobby is working to ban as anti-semitic any truth or disagreeable fact that pertains to Israel.  It is permissible to criticize every other country in the world, but it is anti-semitic to criticize Israel, and anti-semitism will soon be a universal hate-crime in the Western world.

Most of Europe has already criminalized doubting the Holocaust.  It is a crime even to confirm that it happened but to conclude that less than 6 million Jews were murdered.  

Why is the Holocaust  a subject that is off limits to examination? How could a case buttressed by hard facts possibly be endangered by kooks and anti-semitics?  Surely the case doesn't need to be protected by thought control.  

Imprisoning people for doubts is the antithesis of modernity.  

Paul Craig Roberts was Assistant Secretary of the Treasury in the Reagan administration. He is coauthor of The Tyranny of Good Intentions.He can be reached at: PaulCraigRoberts@yahoo.com

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