I've finally achieved consistency in my life. Any person of average or above intelligence can predict what I will say next with unerring accuracy. And what I say will always be wrong.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] My Conversation With Satan, Fart 2: The Movie

 

Due to a tremendous outpouring of popular demand, I have moved the release date of the second installment of the "My Conversation With Satan" Trilogy from 2014 (I was on the George Lucas timetable!) to today!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r2MY2cGoxWk

I hope you all enjoy watching it as much as I enjoyed making it. And living it.

--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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Monday, August 22, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] My Conversation With Satan: The Movie

 

The critics have spoken: "awesome job for a butt monkey ass lover"

By popular demand, this beloved literary masterpiece is now a cinematic blockbuster:

Check out "My conversation with Satan" at:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OVIVwLm5a_A


--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] My Conversation With Satan [1 Attachment]

 
[Attachment(s) from matt love included below]

A short while ago, I had a chat with Satan. I don't usually go out of my way to talk with malevalent entities, but I will pretty much talk with anybody who opens a chat with me. I'll talk with robots, I'll chat with women that want to show me their naughty bits on webcam, I'll chat with Nigerians with excellent investment opportunities for me in their country, and yes, I will chat with the Prince of Darkness himself  I will play a gig anywhere there are 3 people that want to see me, a booking in hell couldn't be much worse that Shelton, Washington, lol!  I never used to say lol, but Satan says it, and now that he's mind controlled me, I find I'm saying it too. 

Satan has a great profile picture, I was sort of surprised, I expected to be frightened, but he pretty much looks like most the people you meet every day of your life.  I've attached it, I hope it comes through.

uallr_funny: fuk off
valis2001us: ok
uallr_funny: u fuk
valis2001us: not as often as I would like to
uallr_funny: i dont no u
uallr_funny: so fuk off
valis2001us: ok
uallr_funny: block me
valis2001us: why?  I find you entertaining. I wouldn't want to miss our little talks.
uallr_funny: on
uallr_funny: i dont no u
uallr_funny: so block me asswiper
valis2001us: I didn't think I knew you, either, but now I remmber.  You're the single white guy who paints and plays music in live art and music shows,you're  into the paranormal and design spirit type graphics
valis2001us: I'm the married white guy who is a Pisces
And I like chihuahuas and
Chinese noodles
Last message received on 22/08 at 6:45 PM
valis2001us: Can I blog abuot this conversation?
valis2001us: yahoo said you linked your yahoo and facebook accounts - is this you:  http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1050642579
valis2001us: maybe this is you:  http://www.facebook.com/al.branson
uallr_funny has signed back in. (22/08/2011 7:10 PM)

uallr_funny: why not
valis2001us: great!  can I use your real name?
uallr_funny: what is my real name?
valis2001us: that does't seem to be the easiest thing to figure out.
uallr_funny: send me link to blog so i can talk more shit to u on ur fucking stupid shit blog ok ?
uallr_funny: satan is my name
uallr_funny: use it please
valis2001us: Satan aka RB BR
uallr_funny: who is rb br?
uallr_funny: branson hardee
valis2001us: Rb br is your name on Tagged
uallr_funny: im not on tagged
uallr_funny: tagged.com sucks
uallr_funny: for whimps
valis2001us: sombody spoofed us both then:  RB BR uallr_funny@yahoo.com via taggedmail.com to
uallr_funny: Im on myspace and facebook
uallr_funny: taggedmail.com
uallr_funny: never used it
uallr_funny: whats my link if Im on site?
uallr_funny: satan is my fav name so use my real fav name
uallr_funny: ppl know hwo Iam
valis2001us: I went to login to see, but its asking for passwrod and all that.
uallr_funny: satan prince of the world
valis2001us: I've always wondered if you were real..
uallr_funny: Im very real
uallr_funny: god is real
uallr_funny: angels are real
valis2001us: this is great news, because I thought "If I ever talk to Satan I'm going ot ask him to join The Icehole Sailors"
uallr_funny: demons on real
valis2001us: but I see from your attitude that you are not a joiner, but you might be a ruler.
uallr_funny: icehole saloon
uallr_funny: funny
uallr_funny: Im a member
valis2001us: You can be the new lead vocalist
valis2001us: http://www.soundclick.com/IceholeSailors
valis2001us: We even have a song named after one of your minor demons. 
valis2001us: "dust devil"
uallr_funny: lol
uallr_funny:
uallr_funny:
valis2001us: that's very demonic, and I'm frightened now
valis2001us: I wish I was in my bathtub with my rubber duckie. I would squeeze it.
uallr_funny: ur funny
uallr_funny: 2 bad u will burn in hell while i lol at u
uallr_funny:
valis2001us: or maybe singing my song... I have a long history of interest in demonology:  http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=6310310
uallr_funny: as if Ill click a sound click link
uallr_funny: that site sucks my evil big ass balls
valis2001us: well, as Satan you lack for nothing, so you won't ever miss what you are missing.
uallr_funny: I see all things
uallr_funny: i know all things
valis2001us: It is a sucky site. My stuff fits in there pretty perfectly
uallr_funny: I can come within ur soul and make u do very bad things
uallr_funny: watch
valis2001us: you are right!
valis2001us: instead of feeding the dogs now, I think I'll eat them instead
uallr_funny: Im better then god
uallr_funny: u no why?
valis2001us: that's amazing, how do you do that?
valis2001us: its like you're thinking at me with my brain
uallr_funny: watch this
uallr_funny: man im so evil
valis2001us: ouch, that hurts
uallr_funny: projecting into ur little brain evil things
uallr_funny: like a bad movie
valis2001us: yes, I didn't know somethng that big would fit there
valis2001us: ouch
uallr_funny: ur so gay
valis2001us: you made me do it
uallr_funny: pitch fork u to death
uallr_funny: yes how i made u write a blog about me
valis2001us: Once I was pursued by a mob with pitchforks...
uallr_funny: pretty dam cool of u
 I will not take u to hell that fast
uallr_funny: keep serving my will
uallr_funny: pray to me
uallr_funny: thank me for not taking u to hell now
valis2001us: and torches:  http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=6173018
uallr_funny: shut up
valis2001us: oh that's right
valis2001us: you aren't going to go to soundclick.
valis2001us: they don't have it in hell, only in pergatory
valis2001us: or something like that
valis2001us: I'm still picking dog out of my teeth
valis2001us: that was strangely enjoyable.
valis2001us: I will keep serviing your will, yes, I will!
uallr_funny: there is no pergatory
valis2001us: your will is my will
uallr_funny: only heavena nd hell
valis2001us: did they lie about that to me, too?
uallr_funny: and the middle grounds on witch u stand
uallr_funny: the bible was written by me by the way
valis2001us: well, I've imagined there's no pergatory... It's easy if you try
uallr_funny: not a word really true
uallr_funny: no history can back up the bible lies
valis2001us: how about John Lennon, is he with you, too?
uallr_funny: no facts other then a few broken stone tablets
uallr_funny: John is in hell yes
valis2001us: Can I expect to meet Kurt Cobain in hell, too?
uallr_funny: dimebag darrell is in hell
uallr_funny: jimi hendrix is in hell
uallr_funny: jim morrison is in hell
uallr_funny: paul will die next
uallr_funny: he also will be coming to hell
valis2001us: I was in a band that opened for Nirvana once. but I didn't meet Cobain because there were like 8 bands in between us. So I'm looking forward to meeting him in hell
uallr_funny: ringo will also live in hell forever
valis2001us: How about Andy Warhol?  Hell?
uallr_funny: Kurt is in hell
uallr_funny: he killed him self and many think it was a murder
valis2001us: Can you ask him if its true what Rat said - that he remembered me from the Wimps?
valis2001us: Cause I didn't remember him at all.
uallr_funny: I was watching rolling on the floor as he shot up drugs and then shot him self
uallr_funny: was so funny
valis2001us: Brian Jones? Is he in hell?
uallr_funny: he is a special friend to me we get along great
valis2001us: Jim Croce?
uallr_funny: he reaps souls for me part time
uallr_funny: no jim C
uallr_funny: did not make it to hell
uallr_funny: he is alive
uallr_funny: faked death
valis2001us: Oh, man. if anybody deserved to go to hell..
uallr_funny: like Bon scott
valis2001us: ah, so he still has a chance..
uallr_funny: Bon will be living in hell when he dies
valis2001us: is he hanging out with Elvis and L ron Hubbard on a UFO ?
uallr_funny: Bon lost his sing voice
uallr_funny: so he faked his death
valis2001us: Bon?  Scott?  Jovie?
uallr_funny: ACDC
valis2001us: oh, right.
uallr_funny: highway to hell
valis2001us: and he didn't even make it. ironic
uallr_funny: elvis is not in hell
uallr_funny: he is alive
valis2001us: I got a chunk of dog leg caught in my throat, I need to go to the kitchen and try to pull it out with a salad tong
uallr_funny: he will go to hell when he dies
valis2001us: of course, you already knew that
valis2001us: brb lol, satan!
uallr_funny: yull be blocked
uallr_funny: fuck off
uallr_funny has signed out. (22/08/2011 7:35 PM)

Last message received on 22/08 at 7:35 PM

--
I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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Attachment(s) from matt love

1 of 1 Photo(s)

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] racism much?

 

My friend the right wing radio commentator in Yakima and ostensible Christian posted on Facebook:

"...whether sporting a flea-infested camel blanket or some little number fashioned from the palace drapes - [Gaddafi] sure was a snappy dresser."

Yes, he should have warn suits by Georges de Paris, who of course makes suits for Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Obama, and Jesus.

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Friday, August 19, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: Your Petition is Scheduled to End

 

Change you can believe in is so hard to achieve...

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Change.org <mail@change.org>
Date: Fri, Aug 19, 2011 at 10:00 AM
Subject: Your Petition is Scheduled to End
To: mattlove1@gmail.com


Your petition: Nobel Committee: Revoke Barack Obama's Peace Prize, is scheduled to end in 5 days, on Aug 24, 2011. Currently you are at 1% of your signature goal.

If you want to give your supporters more time to sign your petition, extend your petition end date.

You can also:
Adjust your Signature Goal
Recruit More Supporters
Send an Update
Close your Petition

Thanks for all that you do,
- The Change.org Team




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I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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Thursday, August 18, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: webOS Dies

 

I've told Bob over and over and I'm done with him. A visit to the so-called Genius Bar is like going to Chuckie Cheese's a madhouse staffed by stupid little shits. So happy I'm getting off the mac platform on my laptop and going back to a pc.

He must have been bragging up the greatness of Bill Gates a few years ago.  Now it's Steve Jobs. Big deal. I predict things are gonna be very different in 5 years.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Bob Lefsetz <bob@lefsetz.com>
Date: Thu, Aug 18, 2011 at 6:15 PM
Subject: webOS Dies
To: mattlove1@gmail.com



Huh? What's that? And why is this important to me?

I'll speak English. webOS is Palm. Which failed in its last iteration as a handset manufacturer and ran HP's tablet until today, when both were killed.

The reason this is important is because in tech, we've only got one winner. Everybody gravitates to one platform and the rest die or are marginalized.

But what about Android you say?

Android was helped by a quirk of fate. The unavailability of the iPhone on carriers other than AT&T. It filled a niche which is slowly evaporating, look at today's report showing the decline of Android at Verizon, the provider that championed the service: http://bit.ly/okuSQ7

Sure, Android's free to the manufacturer, but every device is different and there's no oversight of app quality and iOS is just safer and easier to use, never mind the fact you can get your questions answered at the Genius Bar, don't underestimate the power of customer service.

But what's fascinating is computer hardware has turned into the entertainment business. Where hits and failures are determined overnight. Takes only a weekend to know if a movie's gonna make it, really only a day, and not a whole hell of a lot longer when it comes to music. Hell, HP's TouchPad was only introduced this summer!

So this means we're gonna have one streaming service in America. Just like there's only one iTunes and one iPod and one iPad. Sure, those three are Apple products, but Apple learned it's not so much about being first as being right, because you depend on your customers to sell your product, and word of mouth online is instant.

And people know if your album is good or bad just that fast.

Despite all the buzz on the Jay-Z/Kanye album, all the reports of digital sales, reviews have been lukewarm, it won't have the staying power of Adele's "21". Sure, it will support a tour, but could it be in stadiums, like the country artists?

Yes, it turns out despite the killing of rock and roll radio stations we live in a rock and roll world. That's the sound of America. Not only of classic rock, but today's country music. They might throw in a banjo or a fiddle, if you listen real hard you might find country roots, but today's country music is really yesterday's rock and roll. And country dominates. Hell, that woman in Sugarland was a rocker before she went country.

The point is don't listen to the press. Top Forty is a sexy story, but if you think Katy Perry has one tenth of the staying power of Tayor Swift, you're myopic. And Kenny Chesney's hit radio days may be running on fumes, he doesn't dominate like he used to, but he can still sell tickets, in stadia.

So if you want to go for domination, play rock. Call it country, whatever you want, but feature those guitars and a big chorus and go for it.

If you're playing any other kind of music, you're niche.

But that does not mean you're dead. You can grow. Even though you might hit a wall. Because people might only buy one phone, but they'll enjoy multiple kinds of music.

But if you're playing for all the marbles, if you're all in, employing the monster hype, you're either gonna succeed or fail, and odds are you're gonna tank.

No one's gonna be talking about Jeff Bridges's album a month from now. Hell, they won't even be talking about it a week from now, except to report the anemic sales number which will immediately deflate to zero.

You've got to be in it for the long haul. Nobody's gonna create apps for the dead HP TouchPad and nobody wants to follow an act that isn't spreading roots. And you've got to be great. The HP tablet was really good, but it wasn't as great as the iPad.

Are you as great as the iPad? Are you undeniable?

If not, you're not going to dominate, sorry.


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I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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Tuesday, August 16, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: Tapsoba Salifou sent you a VIP priority message

 

Maybe you'd like to be best friends with the gold mining Tapsoba Salifou. I'm kind of busy right now.


helllo
Between you and
View profile

  Tapsoba Sa...

2011 Aug 16 16:56

hi dear i am salif from bamako mali i want to be your best friend i am working in gold mining try to contact on skype dimar30 or email me dimarfilas@yahoo.fr
best regards
salif


---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: WAYN <info@whereareyounow.com>
Date: Tue, Aug 16, 2011 at 11:56 AM
Subject: Tapsoba Salifou sent you a VIP priority message
To:
Cc: Matt <mattlove1@gmail.com>


Hi Matt

  Tapsoba Salifou has sent you a  VIP Priority Message

To read the message, click on the button below:

    Read VIP priority message    

You have also 11 unread messages from: Sandra, WAYN, Tintin and more


Regards,

The WAYN Team


If you don't want to receive these emails anymore, unsubscribe
To stop receiving emails from Tapsoba, click here




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I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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Monday, August 15, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] the asswipes over at flavorpill are censoring me again...

 

http://flavorwire.com/200333/the-30-harshest-musician-on-musician-insults-in-history

Crooks/Shakir said:

1. Tupac on The Notorious BIG
All of "Hit 'Em Up," really, but particularly this: "I fucked your bitch, you fat motherfucker."

I wrote:
Lesane Parish Crooks (aka Tupac) was such a lovely man, wasn't he? Why do the hipsters pick the most lowlife scum to idolize (Kurt Cobain, Marshall Mathers, Brian Warner, William S. Burroughs and so on)?  It's worse with Crooks though, they make him out to be like Martin Luther King or something. I seriously don't get it.  And by the way, there's a difference between being catty about somebody's hair or something, and pointing out serious character flaws in people that are idolized by the masses, but shouldn't be (Bono, Geldof, etc) and wouldn't be if people would bother to do a little research. Good on people that have the courage to do that.

They immediately removed it.

They can't stand the truth, but they can't stop me as long as I have my blog

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Sunday, August 14, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] A couple of barely-related-to-Ishtar items

 

1.That a lawnmower can do all that:
http://www.m0ar.org/4973

2. Anne and I watched The Road to Bali (1952) with Bing Crosby, Bob Hope and Dorothy Lamour last night. It was just unbelievably bad, as bad as I think things are in the world today, they'd never get away with releasing a movie that bad these days.

Or when Ishtar was released. It`s strange that people would make invidious comparisions between Ishtar and the Crosby/Hope Road movies.  I hadn't seen any of them since I was a child, when I thought they were great, and I might have thought this one was great when I was less than 10 years old, too, but to the me of 2011, it was almost impossible to watch.

It's obvious they worked really hard on Ishtar and delivered a movie that surpasses the model the way Blade Runner surpasses Robot Monster, and it's very sad people didn't (and don't) understand that.

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Friday, August 05, 2011

[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: Your Weekly Petition Update

 

Well, it's something, anyway

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Change.org <mail@change.org>
Date: Fri, Aug 5, 2011 at 9:04 AM
Subject: Your Weekly Petition Update
To: mattlove1@gmail.com


Congratulations, your petitions received 1 signature this week!

------------------------------------------------------------------
Petition Tip: Find Groups and Communities Related to Your Petition
To find supporters who will actively promote your petition, look for people who are active in groups related to your cause. Find them by searching for your petition topic at:

  1. http://groups.google.com/
  2. http://www.facebook.com/search/
  3. http://groups.yahoo.com/

And let them know about your petition, by joining the group and the conversation! ------------------------------------------------------------------

Here are your petition stats:

Patriots, Economic victims, people who believe in the rule of law: Join the campaign "Dump Obama in 2012, draft a competent progressive"
1 signature this week | 1 signature total
0 from Facebook | 0 from email | 0 from Twitter
99 signatures still needed to reach your goal of 100.
Promote your petition | Edit your petition | Send an update to Supporters

Nobel Committee: Revoke Barack Obama's Peace Prize
0 signatures this week | 3 signatures total
0 from Facebook | 1 from email | 0 from Twitter
9999997 signatures still needed to reach your goal of 10000000.
Promote your petition | Edit your petition | Send an update to Supporters

Thanks,
- The Change.org Team




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To stop getting weekly summaries about your petitions, click here:
http://www.change.org/account_settings/petition_summary_emails_opt_out/ZSJAYNAKFQHUSBHMIMTU?message_id=u481336_wesu_1312549467




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I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] Fwd: Your 3rd petition has been created - Start promoting it today!

 

If anybody feels like devoting a few seconds to a meaningless, futile act of defiance that will accomplish nothing but might make you feel a little better for a few seconds in the midst of the ascendent police state and the economy descending into chaos (it worked for me) venture over to the Obama-campaign-founded Change.org and cast your vote!  If you agree with me that this is one small step in a perhaps impossible climb back to civilizatin, that is.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Change.org <mail@change.org>
Date: Fri, Aug 5, 2011 at 8:51 AM
Subject: Your 3rd petition has been created - Start promoting it today!
To: mattlove1@gmail.com


Congratulations on creating your 3rd petition: "Patriots, Economic victims, people who believe in the rule of law: Join the campaign "Dump Obama in 2012, draft a competent progressive""
You've just taken a powerful step toward making a change!

The most effective way to start recruiting signatures is to email your friends. A direct, personal note to people you know is the most powerful tool you have.

We've provided an example email below that you can customize or directly forward to your friends. If you want to use our email importer tool to send a message to many friends at the same time, click here.

------------------------------------
Friends,

I just created a petition entitled Patriots, Economic victims, people who believe in the rule of law: Join the campaign "Dump Obama in 2012, draft a competent progressive", because I care deeply about this very important issue.

I'm trying to collect 100 signatures, and I could really use your help.

To read more about what I'm trying to do and to sign my petition, click here:
http://www.change.org/petitions/patriots-economic-victims-people-who-believe-in-the-rule-of-law-join-the-campaign-dump-obama-in-2012-draft-a-competent-progressive?share_id=xAuQContLo&pe=pce

It'll just take a minute!

Once you're done, please ask your friends to sign the petition as well. Grassroots movements succeed because people like you are willing to spread the word!

Matt
------------------------------------

Looking for more ways to spread the word? Read our handy guide to promoting your petition on the web:
http://www.change.org/info/how-to-collect-petition-signatures

Thanks,
- The Change.org Team




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[ItsAllAboutMeMan] The end of a beautiful relationship

 

flossi buhmann: hey, what social networking sites are you a part of?

flossi buhmann: hey you, whats up
valis2001us: flossi
valis2001us: how are you? 
flossi buhmann: credit card is just to verify your age, it's like $1 for age verification thru my cam session invite since I'm a premium member
flossi buhmann: I'm great babe!! how about yourself?
valis2001us: do you mind if I call you dental flossi?
flossi buhmann is typing...
flossi buhmann: yup, then once your logged in just click Premium Live Cams on top right..i'm gonna slip into something nice for you..k?
valis2001us: wow, flossi, I just read something that makes my dick totally limp.  sorry, I can't perform knowing about all this crap:  http://counterpunch.org/turse08042011.html
valis2001us: read it and you'll see what I mean
valis2001us: Hey Flossi!
valis2001us: I just put our previous chat, including your private phone number, on my blog:  http://mattlove1.blogspot.com/ 
valis2001us: Does that excite you?
valis2001us: Does it make you want to take your clothes off on camera?
valis2001us: Hello?
valis2001us: Flossi?
valis2001us: Dental Flossi?
valis2001us: Don't you want to be my friend any more?



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I want to play in your town for you and 2 of your friends. 
http://eventful.com/performers/matt-love-/P0-001-000156481-4/demands

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