I've finally achieved consistency in my life. Any person of average or above intelligence can predict what I will say next with unerring accuracy. And what I say will always be wrong.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

[CanYoAssDigIt] Re: Six-word Memoir/Drama Bookshop

Hi Rachel

I am so ecstatically happy to get some of the recognition that I so
richly deserve, that so often eludes me. While I think of myself
primarily as a failed songwriter, I am happy to accept the mantle of
semi-successful writer of six word memoirs.

Is the Drama Bookshop in Wenatchee, Chelan, or Olympia Washington? If
not, probably not. There are more of us Matt Loves out there than one
might think. There is Matt Love the author in Portland, Matt Love the
stilt walker in California, Matt Love the backyard wrestler in the
Midwest... in fact, in Olympia, there was another Matt Love... he also
worked in state government,and we even had the same middle initial...
he rented videos at the same places I did, and he bounced checks in
places I shopped. He had a restraining order against him in
Bellingham, and he would probably be embarrassed if he knew how much I
knew about him, since he became a lawyer and solid citizen (though
some people might think that is oxymoronic). He was a music major in
his undergraduate years, and I tried repeatedly to get him to
collaborate with me musically, but he turned me down - in fact, we
never met face to face, he feared that if we came into contact, there
would be violent reaction that would destroy most of the universe. I
don't know which one of us he thought of as Matt and which one as
Anti-Matt.

Thanks to the world-wide web and search engines I have learned of
drumming Matt Loves, keyboard playing Matt Loves... Matt Loves in Deep
Purple tribute bands in England, folk singing Matt Loves in the US. I
have tried to contact them, proposing the creation of a virtual
(online) band where all the members are named Matt Love, but to date
nobody has ever even answered my e-mails.

Obviously my idea of a fraternity of Matt Loves who share similar
values and experiences (and whacked out sense of humor) by virtue of
having the same name is obviously ill-founded.

I mean, it's better than the Donnas, the Ramones, the Wilburys - we
have the same first and last name, and we were born that way! Imagine
the total confusion that would come from a project like this -
songwriting credits, and royalty payments, if we did something that
was successful. I suppose the thing that tickles me pink is the thing
that the other Matt Loves fear... that loss of identity...

Was your Matt Love a musician? If he was, and you ever make contact
with him again, send him my way, I haven't given up on this project!

On 8/9/07, Rachel Fershleiser wrote:
> Hi Matt,
>
> I'm the editor of a forthcoming book of six-word memoirs in which you've
> been included. If you haven't received official notification, you will soon.
> But I was just wondering, are you the Matt Love I befriended a hundred years
> ago (or three?) at Drama Bookshop? It's a hard name to forget...
>
> Best,
> Rachel
> www.SMITHmag.net
>

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