The Final Score: Miss Congeniality – 2, Audience – 0

This is a kick ass review from The Stranger.
Q: Why do they keep making sequels to turd fests?
A: Do to the fact that we are half as intelligent every 18 months,
yesterdays garbage looks like todays treasures!

Miss Congeniality 2
dir. John Pasquin
Opens Fri March 25.
I never saw Miss Congeniality ONE. I don't think it really matters,
though, because I was able to catch up with the story by reading the
back of the box at the video store. It goes something like this: An
awkward and homely FBI agent is forced to enter herself into a beauty
pageant because some terrorist shit is goin' down. Of course she
solves the case, wins over the heart of every American, and learns a
huge lesson about herself. She also snags a dreamy hunk of a
boyfriend. Aww! I love happy endings!
In Miss Congeniality 2, though, her fame precedes her and starts to
play a negative role in her career. Around the same time, her dreamy
hunk of a boyfriend also decides Miss Pushyjeans is moving too quickly
and he can't take anymore of her stupid snorting laugh. He freaks out
and dumps her.
Like every woman would in this situation, she decides to get as hot as
possible to make him regret it. So she gets a stylist, starts wearing
far too much make-up, and leaves her undercover days behind to become
the public face of the FBI. Everyone loves the underdog and everyone
loves a beauty queen, and the geeky snortasaurus rex is both of those
things! Perfect! Anyway, William Shatner and an annoying prude with a
crown get kidnapped and held on a $5 million ransom. So Bullock and
her sassy bodyguard with anger-management issues start interfering
with the case and ultimately save the day by feeling up Dolly Parton
and dressing like Tina Turner. Seriously. Man, it sucks. MEGAN SELING