[CanYoAssDigIt] Oh, You Men

A co-worker told me this story today about a friend of hers (Not a
friend OF a friend; this story in and of itself is not a good enough
tale to be an urban legend.). She did so because she wanted to get "a
man's perspective" to better understand why the man in the story acted
as he did.

The friend (let's call her Jane) typed up an anonymous note and put it
on the desk of the man (John, let's say). John is the second in command
at the organization where they both work. Jane works much lower in the
hierarchy. (I don't mean "lower" to mean in any way inferior, I'm just
talking about the brute pecking order of all human organizations). The
note commended John for his qualities of confidence, personal integrity,
and some other similar banality I can't remember.

John figured out who left the note and thanked Jane. Jane asked John for
a framed photo of John. He gave her one. Two days later, Jane decided
she didn't want it. So, when John was away from the office for a few
days, Jane slipped into his office (this was described to me as entirely
proper, because the door was not locked), put the framed photo on John's
chair with no kind of explanation, slid his chair back under his desk,
and left.

A few days after John returned to the office. Jane saw him coming down
the hall and immediately detoured to avoid contact with him. Later, Jane
was in the lunchroom and John caught her unawares. He "lunged" at her.
(The ensuing conversation, as it was related to me, sounded strangely
civil after a "lunge") John asked Jane why she returned the photo. (My
co-worker's analysis of why he asked this question is that he must have
been "all hurt" because of his "frail male ego.") Jane told him that
"the frame doesn't go with my decor." John asked if she would like to
have the photo back in a different frame. Jane said yes. (My co-worker
tells me that the real reason is that Jane could not take the photo
home, because it would upset her husband. But Jane wants to keep the
fact that she is married hidden from John at all costs.)

So, John gave Jane the photo in a new frame. The really disturbing (to
my co-worker) part is that he placed his business card over a corner of
the photo, under the glass. Why did he do that? My co-worker opines that
maybe the point was to give Jane his cell phone number.

My co-worker primarily wanted to know about John's last action, thinking
that I would understand because I belong to the same gender. But she
also wondered about John's crazy behavior overall. Could I help her to
understand it? Being as how this co-worker has quasi-authority over me,
and I am at the very bottom of my organization's pecking order, I told
her that I could shed no light.

But, man, we men sure do some crazy shit sometimes. I hope some feminist
organization or another comes to Jane's rescue.

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