I've finally achieved consistency in my life. Any person of average or above intelligence can predict what I will say next with unerring accuracy. And what I say will always be wrong.

Friday, April 25, 2008

[ILoveIshtar] A true story for you

My wife and I are in Paris. She's here for a conference, I tagged along because... well, if you need for me to explain that, you are from Mars.

Today while she was in the conference, I was sightseeing. I followed my usual practice of wandering until I was good and lost, and then tried to find my way back to the hotel.  Despite the crazy quilt street layout, it was easy to get back, we're about a block from the Arc de Triomphe, which is well signposted, and visually very imposing.

But anyway, I took out my camera to get a picture of some architectural feature that interested me, and a car whips over to the side of the road. I thought he were going to ask for directions. 

"Anglais?"  He asked, having sized me up pretty quickly.

"Yes," I said.

"I am speaking English to you," he said. "Where are you from?"

"Canada."

"Quebec?"

"Alberta," I replied.

"Ah.  My grandfather went to Quebec, so I am speaking English very well.  What is your name?  I am Marcello."

"I'm Matt," and we shook hands.

"I am Italian," he said. "I was here for the (?) fashion exposition.  Now I am going to the airport to return to Italy.  I represent Versace, yadda, yadda, and yadda, all the top Italian houses.  They gave me samples for the people who like Italian fashion.l  Do you like Italian fashion?"

"Don't hustle me," I said. "l'm from Edmonton.  They call me the Canadian Goose!"

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