I've finally achieved consistency in my life. Any person of average or above intelligence can predict what I will say next with unerring accuracy. And what I say will always be wrong.

Saturday, July 28, 2007

[CanYoAssDigIt] Free songs for download, and too expensive at that price!

Almost 30 years ago, I co-wrote many songs with a friend... a couple
of years after that, at no small expense, he had demos recorded of
these songs.

I've long lost my copy of this demo, but a dub (intact except for some
childish babble dubbed in by the child on one song) I made turned up
when I was helping a friend move last month.

Yesterday I spent several hours dubbing, digitizing, and uploading the
10 songs.

Unless you are a fan of song poems and the like, you probably
shouldn't waste your time listening to them (or downloading them) at

http://www.soundclick.com/thecringeworthies

They are seriously bad. The worst / best of them sound like we were
on some kind of drugs when we wrote them… not mind-expanding drugs,
but mind-destroying drugs, maybe the kind that Barry Manilow would
take, if he takes drugs.

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Thursday, July 26, 2007

[CanYoAssDigIt] mattlove1 sent you a video!

YouTube  Broadcast Yourself™

mattlove1 wants to share a video with you

Video Description

FREE MP3! Right-click and SAVE!*

http://www.tayzonday.com/Tay_Zonday_Internet_Dream.mp3

*All rights reserved.

LYRICS:

Internet Dream

"Man this internet's something else"

[Verse]

Cuttin it close
Let the dishes turn green
Everyone chasin their
Internet dream

Some like it hot
In a triple X funk
'Winnin the auction
'Turnin money to junk

'Cappin the flag
In a virtual dash
'Skippin your wedding
To play in a match


[Chorus]

Shut all the blinds
You mighta been seen
'Sittin alone
With your internet dream

Winning the race
For your digital fix
Living your life
With a clickity-click
(Repeat)

"So every day I swear
I'm gonna go to bed at like eleven.
And all of a sudden its 4AM . . .
And I was just watching Youtube and
reading Wikipedia for five hours.
It's like MAN . . . you ask me the
next day. I can't even remember
what I was doin. Crazy."

[Verse ]

[Chorus]

"I was talkin to my mom the other day
And she's like 'Oh,
My computer's been acting up again!'
So I'm thinkin she got a virus
or something . . .
And I'm like 'ok what's wrong?'
And she's like 'You know that bar that
you type the website in! It disappeared!
I can never remember how to get it back!'
I'm like 'ok Mom. We did this last week.'
I love my Mom and Dad. "

[Chorus X 2]

Personal Message

I have seen the future of rock and roll, and he is Tay Zonday

To accept my friend request, click here.

To respond to mattlove1, click here.

Thanks,
mattlove1

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[CanYoAssDigIt] Heard on the radio in Germany...Questionable taste...

Still sorting through experiences in our European trip... still
putting together the little anecdotes before I tackle the really big,
interesting stories...

Them new fangled country boys sure know how to show a gal a real fine time!

Harmless fun:
Brad Paisley Ticks Lyrics

Every time you take a sip
In this smoky atmosphere
You press that bottle to your lips
And I wish I was your beer
In the small there of your back
Your jeans are playing peekaboo
I'd like to see the other half of your butterfly tattoo.

Hey that gives me an idea
Let's get out of this bar
Drive out into the country
And find a place to park.

'Cause I'd like to see you out in the moonlight
I'd like to kiss you way back in the sticks
I'd like to walk you through a field of wildflowers
And I'd like to check you for ticks.

I know the perfect little path
Out in these woods I used to hunt
Don't worry babe I've got your back
And I've also got your front
Now, I'd hate to waste a night like this
I'll keep you safe you wait and see
The only thing allowed to crawl all over you when we get there is me.

You know every guy in here tonight
Would like to take you home
But I've got way more class than them
Babe that ain't what I want.

'Cause I'd like to see you out in the moonlight
I'd like to kiss you way back in the sticks
I'd like to walk you through a field of wildflowers
And I'd like to check you for ticks.

You never know where one might be
There's lots of places that are hard to reach
I gotcha.

I'd like to see you out in the moonlight
I'd like to kiss you baby way back in the sticks
I'd like to walk you through a field of wildflowers
And I'd like to check you for ticks.
I'd sure like to check you for ticks...

*****

Just don't try it in real life:

Tick 'finder' receives probation
Man who sexually assaulted women to continue treatment
By DAVID DOEGE
ddoege@journalsentinel.com
Posted: July 2, 2007

Waukesha - A small-business operator who sexually assaulted several
women by telling them they had a tick on them before touching their
buttocks and, in some cases, pulling their pants down was sentenced
Monday to three years' probation.
Advertisement

Michael F. Knurr was sentenced after his defense attorney told
Waukesha County Circuit Judge Ralph Ramirez that Knurr's behavior was
apparently rooted in some form of mental illness.

"There was some kind of breakdown," Gerald Boisits said of Knurr, who
insists he can recall virtually nothing of the encounters that ran him
afoul of the law.

But one woman who was sexually assaulted by Knurr in her yard regarded
his memory loss as a convenient excuse and said he was unbelievably
brash, following her into her home.

"After all you did to me you gave me your business card," the woman
said in court of Knurr, who operates a tree service. "Unbelievable.

"You are a disturbed individual. You need to get professional help."

Knurr, 39, of Mukwonago, was sentenced by Ramirez on three counts of
fourth-degree sexual assault, a misdemeanor. As a condition of his
probation, Ramirez ordered that Knurr, a father of two with no prior
criminal record, continue receiving mental health treatment.
Underwent therapy

Boisits indicated that Knurr underwent inpatient therapy since the
encounters came to light and he is taking four medications. The
treatment and medications, according to Boisits, have improved Knurr
since he first came to his office to discuss his legal troubles.

"He appeared in my office, and I honestly could not understand
anything he was talking about," Boisits said.

Knurr was charged for incidents that occurred last year from June to
November in Muskego, New Berlin and Waukesha.

In one case, the criminal complaint says, a New Berlin woman, 32,
called Knurr for an estimate to remove a tree.

As they were walking, the complaint says, Knurr told the woman about a
tick. She told him to get it off and pulled her shorts down slightly.
She felt a pinch on her left buttock. He said, "I got it."

She looked at his hand and didn't see a tick, but she thanked him. He
said, "Oh no, it was my pleasure."

In another instance, the complaint says, he told a woman asking about
having a tree removed that there was a tick on her, and he put his
hand down her pants and groped her buttocks.

Knurr pleaded no contest in the case.

Prosecutors think Knurr used the routine on at least 16 women, not all
of whom were assaulted.

Knurr apologized in court Monday and said he hoped his troubled
behavior was a thing of the past, telling Ramirez, "I hope nothing
will happen."

"I just want to put this behind me and get on with my life," he said.

In sentencing Knurr, Ramirez stayed a 90-day jail term, time he said
Knurr's probation agent could use as he sees fit if troubles develop
during his supervision.

From the July 3, 2007 editions of the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
Have an opinion on this story? Write a letter to the editor or start
an online forum.

Subscribe today and receive 4 weeks free! Sign up now.

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[CanYoAssDigIt] mattlove1 sent you a video!

YouTube  Broadcast Yourself™

mattlove1 wants to share a video with you

Video Description

*****CONTEST*****
Create a movie trailer for this video, please post it as a video response. The person who makes the best one will get a Surprise! :)

Deadline for movie trailer entries is Friday, August 3rd. If you don't know how to get the footage from this video, you can try http://www.downloadyoutubevideos.com/

-------------------------

-About The Video:
I spent a week and a half (literally over 150 hours) on this video, I really hope you guys like it. I put my all into it. Needless to say, my livingroom is a mess from all the costumes and props. :)

I created all of the animations from scratch, played all of the characters, edited, wrote the script, did everything on this. It is 100% original, from the pits of my crazy mind. :) It's weird, I have to warn you. But if you are a subscriber, you would already know that I am a strange girl. :)

Thank you to Nigel Simmons for offering me his beautiful music to score most of this video. http://nigel.has.it

To Answer the Techie Questions I know I will get: I did all the animations frame by frame, and some by key framing. All the graphics are created by me in photoshop (for example- the sky palace.) With the exception of desert backgrounds and camels etc., which I obviously couldn't generate. Those images are stock photos. I had a lot of fun customizing everything in this video. I can actually say that I built this thing from scratch, thanks to my Mac Pro. I would never have been able to do all of this on my pc without frequent crashing.

As usual, no one helped me. But my mom was really nice and sewed Ethereal's neck ruff and the enchanted cloak. Thanks Mommy :)

List of Characters in This Episode:
-VenetianPrincess
-Elizabeth
-Drunk Pirate Who Ran Out of Rum
-2 Pirates playing cards
-Edmund
-The Sky Boat Renter
-The Sky Fisherman
-Ethereal, The Sky Goddess
-Claudius and Larithius, the Cherubs

..Looking forward to your movie trailers!

Personal Message

Solo Dweeb Makes Socco Boffo Soundtrack Appearance.

When reached for comment in his secret mountaintop hide away in Edmonton,Matt Love said, "It's both socco and boffo. It's hard to say whether it's more socco or boffo, but it's got a heck of a lot of each!"

VP writes:

Date: 26 Jul 2007 1:57
Subject: My New Video Will Shock You- Check it Out
Body: Check Out my new video "Quest For The Key" here





*****CONTEST*****
If you think you can make a creative movie trailer for this video, please post it as a video response. The person who makes the best one will get a Surprise! :)


I spent a week and a half (literally over 150 hours) on this video, I really hope you guys like it. I put my all into it. Needless to say, my livingroom is a mess from all the costumes and props. :)

I created all of the animations from scratch, played all of the characters, edited, wrote the script, did everything on this. It is 100% original, from the pits of my crazy mind. :) It's weird, I have to warn you. But if you are a subscriber, you would already know that I am a strange girl. :)

Thank you to Nigel Simmons for offering me his beautiful music to score most of this video.

To Answer the Techie Questions I know I will get: I did all the animations frame by frame, and some by key framing. All the graphics are completely original created by me in photoshop (for example- the sky palace.) With the exception of desert backgrounds and camals etc., which I obviously couldn't generate. Those images are royalty free purchased from istockphoto.com

To accept my friend request, click here.

To respond to mattlove1, click here.

Thanks,
mattlove1

Using YouTube

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Check the Help Center for answers to common questions.
Your Account Settings
To change your preferences, settings, or personal info, go to the 'My Account' section.
Email Notifications
To change or cancel email notifications from YouTube, go to the Email Options section of your Profile.

Copyright © 2007 YouTube, Inc.

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Sunday, July 22, 2007

[CanYoAssDigIt] How Low Can You Go?

Back home, recovering from jet lag...

Here's a report on our European Vacation. Maybe not the most important
thing that happened, but for some reason, it's currently at the
uppermost of the toppermost of my alleged mind.

On the train to the airport, I noticed how far this mania among the
fair sex for lowering the waist line of their jeans has gone. I could
see the stubble of the top of a woman's pubic hair above the top of
her jeans. Presumably shaved to accommodate the extremely low
waistline.

My friends, is not this trend the greatest fashion disaster since the
murder of Gianni Versace? it's so unrelentingly ugly - with the pants
stretched tightly across the lower half of the woman's posterior, they
upper half is squeezed out the top of the pants, changing the
aesthetically pleasing pear shape of her ass into an appalling
mushroom shape.

On a trim attractive woman it's unattractive - on overweight women,
it's.... words fail me.

See? I can go an entire post without talking about Bush. At least, that Bush.

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